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johnny696920062 59 / M
"Ummm.... I guess we're all here for the same thing..."
HUNTERSVILLE, North Carolina, United States
 
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Last Visit: More than 3 months

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Status
johnny696920062 59/M
HUNTERSVILLE, North Carolina
Introduction
Oh wow -- you're actually reading this!!!! Ok, ok, ok.... Writing about myself is nowhere near as easy as I thought it would be! Where do I start? Well, let's see: what am I looking for? Ideally, a beautiful blond (or redhead, brunette, or black-haired beauty) with no gag-reflex and an oral fetish that loves to swallow!!!! Extra points if you own your own island (did you have to name it when you bought it?) or have a billionaire father and are the sole heiress! But I'll settle for a woman with a heart-beat.... oh, alright: or someone pretending to be a woman with a heart-beat (as long as the pictures you post are of the beautiful women described above!) What else? Ohhhh... nerd-joke alert! If a chemist dies in the forest, do you have to BARIUM? lol!!! ok, ok, ok... just one more... two atoms are walking down the street, when one turns to the other and says, "I dropped an electron!" "Are you sure?" "Yes, I'M POSITIVE!!" get it? get it? get it? I guess I'm rambling, sorry about that! I have found that cyber is actually lots of fun, besides being safer and easier to arrange. So... if all we do is chat online for awhile, that's cool too.... it's an easy way to get to know each other! RANDOM JOKE: Three guys were on a trip to Saudi Arabia. One day, they stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the Sheik came in. "I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will be punished in a way corresponding to your profession." The sheik turns to the first man and asks him what he does for a living. "I'm a cop", says the first man. "Then we will shoot your penis off!", said the sheik. He then turned to the second man and asked him what he did for a living. "I'm a fireman", said the second man. "Then we will burn your penis off!", said the sheik. Finally, he asked the last man,"And you, what do you do for a living?" And the third man answered, with a sly grin, "I'm a lollipop salesman!" =)) Are you still reading this?? Oboy oboy oboy!! ummm... I got nothing else to say...divoced guy (check!) thinks he's funny (arguable, but check!) looking to chat with other women... and just take it from there! Hope to hear from you!!

My Ideal Person Not really my ideal person, but while rambling, I thought I'd throw in a few of my pet peeves:

1. Don't you think that the Pillsbury doughboy is way too happy considering he has no genitals?

2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

What location do you fantasize about for a sexual encounter?:
The beach, An airplane, A movie theatre, My desk at work, A swimming pool or hot tub, An elevator

What types of sexual activities turn you on?:
Giving Oral Sex, Receiving Oral Sex, Threesomes, Mutual Masturbation, Food Play, Making Home "Movies", Participating in Erotic Photography, Voyeurism

What factors are most important to you when looking for a sexual partner?:
Ability to be discreet, Open to ménage à trois and/or orgies, Sexual appetite, Willingness to freely discuss and try anything, Creativity/Kinkiness level

Have you ever had cybersex?:
I've done it so many times that I've forgotten how to type with two hands.

View more of johnny696920062's responses

Information
  • 59 / male
  • HUNTERSVILLE, North Carolina, United States
Sexual Orientation:
Straight
Looking For:  Women or Couples (2 women)
Birthdate: May 29, 1964
Travels to: Santo Domingo, Florida, Dominican Republic
Relocate?: Maybe/Yes
Marital Status: Divorced
Height: 5 ft 8 in / 172-175 cm
Body Type: Average
Smoking: I'm a non-smoker
Drinking: I'm a light/social drinker
Drugs: I don't use drugs
Education: BA/BS (4 years college)
Race: Hispanic
Religion: Agnostic
Have Children: Yes. We sometimes live together.
Want Children: Happy with what I have
Male Endowment: Average/Average
Circumcised: Yes
Speaks: English, Spanish
Hair Color: Brown
Hair Length: Short
Eye Color: Brown
Glasses or Contacts: Either
My Trophy Case: